"One of this season's great comic gifts."
 Jiggle all the way
By Al Krulick
Orlando Weekly [link]
Photo: Paul Kiernan (left), Tim Williams and Mark Lainer
There was only one Christian family in the Jewish neighborhood in which I grew up, so my memories of this holiday begin and end with candy canes at the Ansons’, two doors down. I was thankful that Christmas coincided with a long school vacation, but otherwise, I never had an emotional attachment to the day itself or what it represented theologically.
Of course, I did imbibe all the Christmas specials on TV and always felt that the season’s songs were snappy and singable. Years later, as a well-paid department store Santa Claus, I began to appreciate the day’s crass commercial aspects, and finally, after marrying into a non-Jewish family, I went the whole nine yards – presents, trees, stockings by the fireplace, etc.
Happily, the production of Every Christmas Story Ever Told at Orlando Shakespeare Theater caters to nonbelievers and longtime revelers alike, presenting a look both sarcastically skewed and affectionate at the special celebration that holds such a singular place on our national calendar.
Under the direction of Jim Helsinger, three of the company’s stalwarts – Paul Kiernan, Mark Lainer and Timothy Williams – hold court regaling us with truncated and prodigiously silly versions of tried-and-true Christmas tales, including How the Grinch Stole Christmas, The Nutcracker Suite, Frosty the Snowman, O. Henry’s The Gift of the Magi and Gustav the Green-nosed Reingoat(!?), among others.
There are side trips to NYC to see the Rockettes and the parade, and educational highlights include the history of fruitcake plus strange Christmas customs in countries around the globe. Fortunately, the loosey-goosiness of Michael Carleton, John Alvarez and Jim Fitzgerald’s script allows for a good dose of satirical ad-libbing. Snide remarks about current events – holiday-related or otherwise – pepper the proceedings throughout.
The highlight of the evening is the extremely amusing conflation of two of our culture’s best-loved Christmas narratives – Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol and Frank Capra’s It’s a Wonderful Life. Watching comedic actor Williams ricochet between the characters of Ebenezer Scrooge and George Bailey, with Lainer playing both the angel Clarence and the Ghost of Christmas something-or-other is one of this – or, for that matter, any – season’s great comic gifts.
"The play is hilarious, silly, energetic, inventive, and most importantly -- fun! And it is the perfect family-friendly holiday entertainment."
 Every Christmas Story Ever Told - In 90 Minutes or Less
By John Garrick
Culture Calendar Orlando [link]
Photo: Tim William (left) and Paul Kiernan
Allow me to introduce you to the funniest Christmas show ever! When you first enter the theater, you could not possibly imagine the "falling-out-of-my-seat-laughing show" that you – and your family – are about to see. The greatest Christmas gift of this season is a set of tickets to Every Christmas Story Ever Told opening at the Orlando Shakespeare Festival on December 2 and running through December 27.
The play begins with an actor sitting in the middle of the stage, seriously prepared to take on the lead role of Scrooge in Charles Dickens' beloved classic A Christmas Carol, but the seriousness of his 'performance' is soon interrupted by two actors who begin an actor's mutiny. The 'mutineers' REFUSE to perform the "classic" for the umpteenth time, saying they only signed on to do it to get the insurance.
After some ingenious banter, the three actors decide to portray every holiday story and character they can remember. The play is hilarious, silly, energetic, inventive, and most importantly -- fun! And it is the perfect family-friendly holiday entertainment. The play miraculously brings together seasonal icons and traditions from beloved classics to pop culture – teasing them mercilessly and at the same time, making us love them all the more. This is the most fun 90-minutes you will spend this entire Holiday Season.
"One mind-blowing feel good Spectacle-Spectacle of a show...two hours of solid laughs."
 Archikulture Digest
By Carl F. Gauze
Ink 19 [link]
Photo: Paul Kiernan (left) and Mark Lainer
Marley was dead. Of course he’s dead; everyone from Donald Duck to Frank H has been beating him over the head for decades. So when Ebenezer Scrooge (Williams) sets out to squeeze another season’s blood out of this literary turnip, both the ghosts of Marley (Lainer) and Christmas Present (Kiernan) object and propose and alternate story arc – combine every other story from Luke to Linus into one mind blowing feel good Spectacle-Spectacle of a show. They pull cardboard tube antlers and bubble pack oceans out of nooks and crannies, creating one of those rarest of holiday events – two hours of solid laughs completely unencumbered by guilt or a need to go “awwww…”
There are too many sight gags and copyright-free rewrites to fairly report, but Lainer as “Gustav The Green Nosed Goat” and Tim Williams as the stammering George Bailey may be the two most striking performances. Not that there was any lack of comedy form Mr. Kiernan, he made a wonderful Chuck Barris on the Fruit, Nut and Dating Game, and read most of the dark and gruesome “Christmas Traditions From Around the Globe”. The comedy in this show flows from multiple angles – broad parodies of The Grinch and The Nut Cracker swirl around visuals of a wonderful one man “Macy’s Float Gone Amuck,” razor sharp “locals only” gags and even a Tiger Woods joke. Clearly the writing team of Carleton, et al. and director Helsinger were cutting and pasting into the wee hours to make this the freshest holiday anti-fruitcake they could.
Does Marley rise from the blacksmithy of the underworld and provide redemption to all us Scrooges? I think that was in there somewhere, but was laughing too hard to notice. If you absolutely, positively need to see every Christmas special ever made but can’t afford cable this season, this is your ticket. But close your eyes during the Polar Express joke, not even this crackerjack team of crackpots could make that turkey funny.
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